Books Read in Bora Bora

I spent most of November reading: in bed, at meals, on our deck overlooking the ocean, on the beach and by the pool with SPF 50 sunscreen slathered on any exposed skin. Although I've gone back to reading "real" hardback books at home, the Kindle is still an absolute treasure trove for travel. I'm increasingly appreciative of the option to increase the font size, so I can continue to push back the date when I have to wear reading glasses.

I had been reading Living with a Wild God: A Nonbeliever's Search for the Truth about Everything by Barbara Ehrenreich before we flew away to Bora Bora, so I finished that first. It's worth reading for people who are interested in mystical / spiritual / transcendent experiences, although it wasn't as penetrating as I hoped it would be. William James' The Varieties of Religous Experience (1901) is still my favorite book in this area. Sam Harris' Waking Up: A Guide to Spirituality without Religion is next on my list to read.

Then I started in with my true love – literary fiction:

A Gate at the Stairs, and Bark: Stories by Lorrie Moore,
Amy and Isabelle by Elizabeth Strout,
Where the God of Love Hangs Out by Amy Bloom,
The Girl Who Fell from the Sky by Heidi W. Durrow,
Ajax Penumbra 1969 by Robin Sloan
The Newlyweds by Nell Freudenberger,
By Nightfall by Michael Cunningham (whose short story, White Angel (1989) is absolutely on my Top Ten All Time list),
The Marriage Plot by Jeffrey Eugenides
Netherland, and The Dog by Joseph O'Neill

All of these were lovely in their own way, but I'm afraid I have to join the bandwagon and say that the best book of the month (and therefore the year) was All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr. My dear friend, Clarissa, had suggested we both read it for discussion during an upcoming trip we're taking together. I'm glad she did. It is beautifully written, complex, and well worth the accolades it's receiving.

One of the many habits I have that baffles Brad is to re-read books I've already read. After reading a plethora of new novels and short stories, I revisted a tome, Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace, which I first read in Alaska in 2005. My blog review of my first reading is here. It has the same number of pages and footnotes the second time, and was just as funny and sad and all that, maybe heightened by DFW's suicide in 2008.

Then I re-read some other wonderful fiction:

Three Junes by Julia Glass
The Windup Girl by Paolo Bacigalupi
Smilla's Sense of Snow by Peter Hoeg
The Art of Fielding, which is in the same league as All the Light We Cannot See. I loved this book when I read it for the first time in 2012, and imagine I'll be re-reading it throughout my reading life. It's one of those first novels that I can't believe is a first novel, like The Kite Runner and The Lovely Bones.

After all that literary fiction, it was time for some palate-cleansing science fiction. I read William Gibson's new book, The Peripheral, and re-read old favorites Neuromancer and Pattern Recognition. Gibson is far and away my favorite science fiction writer, although I did also re-read Dune by Frank Herbert on this trip, which I've read maybe a dozen times.

In preparation for the New Year, I read and re-read several business / organizing / writing / inspiration books. (Asterisks indicate re-reading.)

*The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do by Charles Duhigg
*The Power of Less: The Fine Art of Limiting Yourself to the Essential … in Business and Life by Leo Babauta
*Zen to Done: The Ultimate Simple Productivity System by Leo Babauta
*The Joy Diet: Ten Daily Practices for a Happier Life by Martha Beck
*Making a Literary Life: Advice for Writers and Other Dreamers by Carolyn See
The Willpower Instinct: How Self-Control Works, Why It Matters, and What you Can Do to Get More of It by Kelly McGonigal
Predictably Irrational by Dan Ariely
Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less by Greg Mckeown

Somewhere in there I also re-read a couple of favorite action adventure spy conspiracy thriller books: The Color of Night, and An Absense of Light, both by David Lindsey.

And that was about it. I'm looking forward to a 2015 full of reading and writing, and maybe some more Pacific Ocean sunsets.

First and Last Post of 2014

This year almost past was not a year of writing for me, which is definitely something I'm planning to do differently in 2015! We moved into our new house at the beginning of January. The photo below was taken on our first day. Remodeling the kitchen, furnishing the entire empty place, installing geothermal HVAC for the carriage house, and looking at 14,483 fabric and tile samples and light fixtures with my amazing interior designer took up all of my creative energy, plus some.

I didn't realize how tired I was until we arrived in Bora Bora for a month and I slept 10+ hours a night and took afternoon naps for about 10 days. I slept more than Brad, who is a championship level sleeper. I had read a startlingly small amount in the previous ten months of the year, which was also a sign that my brain was a little too busy making house project decisions. I think I read less up to November than I had since I learned how to read before kindergarten.

Then I made up for lost time, reading about 30 books in the month we were away. I'll do a post tomorrow (New Year! New writing focus and energy!) with a list of the books I read, and at least a comment or two on them.

Here's a view of Bora Bora / Paradise, which is nice to see when it was 18 degrees below zero at our house in Colorado last night. I'll post some more photos, too.

Happy New Year to my readers, family, and friends, and a toast to more writing in 2015!

After the Flood

A little over a week after the massive flash floods that have devasted large swaths of northern Colorado, I'm finally getting around to posting photos of our place. So many people have lost homes and all of their possessions, and I think we're just now getting a sense of the magnitude of the cleanup and repairs facing our communities. We are feeling so lucky and grateful, and sad for our friends and neighbors who have lost so much. Brad and his Foundry Group partners are joining many others in contributing to the recovery efforts. It's going to be a long process.

Our house is inaccessible by road, but we can fix that, at least once the road through Eldorado Canyon State Park is repaired. My intrepid assistant, Naomi Guy, hiked up through the park to the house on Wednesday to assess the state of things and took a bunch of photos that she has generously agreed to share. Brad shared a few of them on his blog post about the flood here.

These photos from above and below the washout on the road in the park show how it might take awhile to fix. The first two photos are used courtesy of neighbor and photographer Jenna Rice.

Our house is essentially untouched. I thought that surely our fountain pond would have broken through, but there it sits.

Our gravel parking area is absolutely pristine.

We had some very slight erosion in the stairs around the house.

So that's the good news.

The bad news is that the bottom ramp where our driveway starts from Kneale Road is completely washed out and there is a new water way running through our meadow which came across the driveway at the north edge of the meadow.

The view approaching our driveway from Kneale Road:

Two views from the top of the driveway ramp looking down onto Kneale Road:

Looking north around the corner at the top of the ramp:

The meadow with a new stream running through it:

Where the water crossed the road at the top of the meadow:

The new stream, with Naomi's backpack for scale:

The upper driveway, facing south:

Where the water crosses the road:

We are lucky. Our house was not destroyed. We have family and friends to help us if we needed it. We have resources to share to help others. If you want to contribute to the recovery, you can find resources at the Entrepreneurs Foundation of Colorado and at our Congressman Jared Polis' website here.

Albania to Zimbabwe: Anchor Point Internships in Global Leadership Conference

Brad and I had the enormous privilege and pleasure of working this weekend with an extraordinary group of Wellesley College students and alumnae who participated in 10 week internship placements in various African countries from Morocco, Cape Verde, Cameroon, Tanzania, and South Africa through the Anchor Point Internships in Global Leadership at Wellesley College. Attendees at the conference literally hailed from countries all the way from Albania to Zimbabwe.

Special thanks to our panelists who so generously shared their Saturday mornings with us, and whose stories of women's leadership will resonate with all of the attendees for a long while.

Jennie Arbogash, Executive Director of Social Venture Partners Boulder County
Nicole Glaros, Managing Director of TechStars
Helayne Jones, President and CEO of the Colorado Legacy Foundation
Lucy Sanders, CEO and Co-founder of National Center for Women and Information Technology (NCWIT)
Alice Srinivasan Donor Relations at Global Greengrants Fund

Thanks to Joanne Murray, Director of the Centers for Work and Service, and the Madeleine Korbel Albright Institute for Global Affairs at Wellesley College for her committment to women's leadership, international experiential learning, and her vision for what the internship participants might mean to each other and to the world.

Thanks to Christina Kiffney Photography for the lovely photos.

After such an intense weekend of exploratory conversation and lively connection, I start my week full of optimism and excitement for the next conference!

Leaving the Canyon – House for Sale

After 17 years of Colorado living in Eldorado Canyon, where we thought we would never leave, we have embarked on a new phase of living and are selling our home. This wasn't actually part of our life plan at the beginning of 2013, but we're making those mid-life decisions and having a "rest of the life house" where we could live well into ripe old age felt like a good decision at this point.

So we're selling our contemporary house which is on 114 acres of land on 3 parcels with incredible views and privacy and Colorado nature all around. When we saw the photos for the real estate listing, we were sad to be leaving the place where we've loved living for so long; but we're ready for a change.

If you're interested in living here, please contact Bill or Tim Goodacre at bill-tim@goodacreproperties.com or www.goodacreproperties.com.

I have loved cooking and entertaining in my kitchen with Poggenpohl aluminum cabinets, double ovens, and gas range.

Dining room with matte stainless steel table

I will officially miss my master closet which could hide an abundance of shoes!

Incredible location

Winter sunrises

Brooks enjoying his comfy leather couch

But we are excited about our new home, too, near Longmont, just north of Boulder, and we look forward to having lots of friends visit!

Boston

It's hard to find any words about the Boston Marathon bombings on Monday.

Instead, I'm posting photos that I took when Brad ran the 2006 Boston Marathon; images of what spring in Boston is supposed to be about.

Sad days.

Startup Life: Advice Column

Q: Dear Amy:

In Startup Life: Surviving and Thriving in a Relationship with an Entrepreneur, you talk about scheduled communication on a daily (Four Minutes in the Morning), monthly (Life Dinner), and quarterly (QX Off the Grid) basis. All that scheduled time doesn't sound very romantic. Where's the romance?

A: The most important point about having regularly scheduled together time is that scheduled romance in no way precludes spontaneous romance. If your days are full of unexpected bouquet deliveries and sleeping in late on Tuesdays after long bouts of lovemaking, maybe you don't need the commitment of time set aside just for the two of you to connect. However, I suspect that if you measure the rate of spontaneous romance events, you will likely find that you may not be having much spontaneous romance anyway in the startup phase of your entreprenurial endeavors. Having calendar appointments gives you something to look forward to during times when your entreprenurial partner is completely occupied by work.

The other really important point about romance is the very definition of the term. What's romantic anyway? This is an important and ongoing conversation to have with your partner. It can be an exciting and intimate journey to test what works for each of you over time. Brad and I don't find much romance in the images created by television commercials by diamond companies, but find romance in the daily moments we share together. Different couples have different ideas about what constitutes romance for them. I personally love the intimacy of the morning and evening routines in the bathroom, brushing and flossing and washing, but we have friends who use separate bathrooms to keep the mystery alive. Figuring out together what feels romantic to you can be an exploratory and very personal part of your relationship.

Dear Readers: What feels romantic to you? Do you find that having a regular date night increases or decreases other spontaneous expressions of romance? And I'm taking other Advice Column questions that lots of people seem to share. Ask away!

Startup Life: Book Review in Forbes

I am delighted to share a thoughtful and positive review of Startup Life in Forbes online by Brent Beshore entitled "7 Changes for Your "Startup Life.'" Click here to read the review.

According to Brent, "If you are an entrepreneur, are thinking of becoming one, or are in a relationship with one, I would highly suggest you buy “Startup Life: Surviving and Thriving in a Relationship With an Entrepreneur.” At the very least, it will give you an inside look at a highly successful long-term relationship that has endured through virtually every cycle of entrepreneurial living. Or, it just might change the way you do life." Thanks for the kind words, Brent!

Brad and I have been overwhelmed by the positive response to the book, and hope that entrepreneurial couples are enjoying the conversations Startup Life is sparking.

Early Review of Startup Life by Jonathan Fields

Want to Have a Startup AND a Life? Read This Book.

Practical Book Shines New Light on The 'Startup Life'

Startup Life: Letters to a Young Poet by Rainer Maria Rilke

One of the long quotes that we intended to include in Startup Life: Surviving and Thriving in a Relationship with an Entrepreneur was this excerpt from Rainer Maria Rilke letters to a 19 year old cadet in the Vienna Military Academy written over a period from 1903 to 1908. Even though the words were written more than a century ago, they are still powerful and timely. This quote was located at the very end of Chapter Two: Philosophy –

It is also good to love: because love is
difficult. For one human being to love another human being: that is perhaps the
most difficult task that has been entrusted to us, the ultimate task, the final
test and proof, the work for which all other work is merely preparation. That
is why young people, who are beginners in everything, are not yet capable of
love: it is something they must learn. With their whole being, with all their
forces, gathered around their solitary, anxious, upward-beating heart, they
must learn to love. But learning-time is always a long, secluded time, and therefore
loving, for a long time ahead and far on into life, is: solitude, a heightened
and deepened kind of aloneness for the person who loves. Loving does not at
first mean merging, surrendering, and uniting with another person (for what
would a union be of two people who are unclarified, unfinished, and still
incoherent?), it is a high inducement for the individual to ripen, to become
something in himself, to become world, to become world in himself for the sake
of another person; it is a great, demanding claim on him, something that
chooses him and calls him to vast distances. Only in this sense, as the task of
working on themselves ("to hearken and to hammer day and night"), may
young people use the love that is given to them. Merging and surrendering and every
kind of communion is not for them (who must still, for a long, long time, save
and gather themselves); it is the ultimate, is perhaps that for which human
lives are as yet barely large enough.

And this quote was the epigraph at the beginning of Chapter Five: Personality –

“Love consists in this, that
two solitudes protect and touch and greet each other.” Rainer Maria Rilke

Enjoy!

Startup Life: Poem of the Day – The Summer Day by Mary Oliver

The Summer Day

Who made the world?
Who made the swan, and the black bear?
Who made the grasshopper?
This grasshopper, I mean-
the one who has flung herself out of the grass,
the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,
who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down-
who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.
Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.
Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.
I don't know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down
into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,
how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,
which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?

– Mary Oliver, New and Selected Poems, 1992,
Beacon Press, Boston, MA. Reprinted with permission.

Mary Oliver is one of my favorite poets. My funeral instructions include the reading of her poem White Owl Flies Into and Out of the Field, along with the playing of some Bach or Samuel Barber. (Brad has specified Pink Floyd "Dark Side of the Moon" for his memorial soundtrack. We are different from each other.)

We had intended to include this poem at the beginning of Startup Life Chapter Six: Values because of the vital questions it asks. These would be excellent starting points for conversations with your life partner over a monthly Life Dinner. It also feels lovely to have summer images during a week of bitter cold here in Colorado.